RIP Linda Barkers fretwork
The last of the Fabulous Linda Barker’s oversized MDF fretwork panels have been carted away by the bulk waste disposal team of Southwark. Some might well say goodriddance but I say the end of an era. No more will FLB be seen marching down Underhill Road with her small dog. No more will her shoot house be opened up to the neighbours to pour over all of the defective goods returned to Really Linda Barker and then sold at really good prices.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the FLB has left SE London.
Who knew?
I was sent this link today:
http://www.pickwickestates.com/Default2.aspx?ID=324&Page=detail
The accompanying message suggested it showed my previous house in Upland Road. I had to take several long hard looks before I realised it was indeed the same house. I have never formed any attachment to these project properties but I confess to being a little puzzled by this subsequent makeover. Not because I feel that the house could not be improved upon and obviously we all have very different tastes, but because what was the essence of the house seems to have been removed. The original windows have been removed, as have the lovely original fire surrounds. In their place modern reproductions have been installed. The lovingly restored floors have been covered in ubiquitous beige carpet.Why have a pastiche when the real thing was already there I wonder?
Happily for the owners, and that lovely old house, the property always had good bones and I do hope that the new buyers will eliminate that show home look that is so proudly trumpeted in the particulars and let the house breathe again. Our before pictures can be seen here:
http://www.helent.co.uk/uploadroad.php
I shot myself - but not in the foot
Following from the Living Etc feature, it has become very apparent that the chosen pictures have met with some disappointment. Although many fantastic shots were taken by Jake Curtis, the photographer, few seem to have made it into the final layout. Therefore, by request and with some trepidation, as I am a poor photographer, here are some more pictures of the house on flickr.
Slacker
In fact, I am worse than a slacker. It have been over one year since my last post. Disgusting. Can it be justified or excused in any way? Probably not, but I hope that by sharing these truly scrumptious pots that I may be cut a little slack. Please?
They are by ceramacist Sophie Cook (www.sophiecook.com) who has a studio in East Dulwich. I bought them at the Artist Open House event during the Dulwich festival. They are so very delicate and beautiful and I just think that the mimosa colour is exquisite. I have displayed them in our bedroom where they pop out against the Farrow & Ball Lamp Room Grey walls.
Since we made our dressing room, the main bedroom has become my favourite room in the house. I could sit for hours on my rocker in the window, sipping tea and watching the builders opposite chuck their rubbish onto the pavement rather than into the skip. I know that I probably look like Norman Bates to the outside world, but when I am in that rocker in that room everything just feels right.
I’m still here
And about time too
So I have been glaringly absent from blogging for some time for a multitude of reasons and, I must confess to having missed it to.
It all went a bit haywire during the final push and the lead up to Christmas was very stressful indeed. The turkey came to pass after a mammoth effort by Barry and Calum to get the kitchen in. It looked almost too good to use and the concealed oven was and is a thing of wonderment. A few negative responses to the cooker hood, mainly from my family who (asked many times) why we had chosen to install our boiler above the hob. Obviously will not be coming again unless written apologies are received.
Generally, we have had a gratifyingly warm response to our efforts but some unwelcome remarks have been mentally logged for future vengence and others for mere comedy value:
“Striking only in it's bareness” - Sister in law re garden.
“Remind me why you bought this house?” - brother re everything.
“In Jamaica, people would not keep cows in a place like this” - Daniel at start of project.
“You could buy an executive home in Chelmsford for half of that”- friends husband.
” I'm not being funny but this is a right shithole”- said on two occasions by two separate people.
” The problem is you are just not used to hard work” - lovely Antonio the plasterer as I attempted to knock out a fireplace.
” I've just seen you having the sand delivered so I thought I would come and take some” - pensioner across the road when I asked why she was going back and forth to her gaff with MY materials. I was too amused to stop her and guess that she must have removed about half a ton during the course of the day.
” This is amazing and so stylish - I would never have thought that you would have a house like this (as you are so obviously a hideous frump from hell with no taste)” - mother of daughters friend.
” This hallway is crying out for brass reproduction door chimes” - Alan the electrician lamenting my choice of bell box.
” When are the carpets coming?” - various pensioners following our days of floorboard sanding.
“I've got a lovely plastic lace cloth that size” - lovely elderly friend feeling sorry for us having seen the new walnut table which we had just taken delivery of.
” If only it were in Dulwich Village……sigh….poor you blah blah blah” - virtually everyone in the world who refuse to believe we actually like East Dulwich.
” How's that house of yours coming on ?- I'll lend you a bbq for your turkey you know” - the lovely Dave at William Rose Butchers.
” Let me take you to lunch - hang the expense let's make it The Harvester” - George.
And so they went on.
Coming up from the rear
are these shots of number four pre and post extension.
It seems an age since we knocked the old extensions down but in fact it was late July when Tui's team swooped down and raised the lot to the ground. How weird that the wallpaper (so lovingly applied by Jack in about 1970) should have clung so firmly to the wall in a last act of defiance when every thing else fell. Hopefully the next 16 weeks worth of work can be seen in the after shot and no-one will think it a heinous crime to have knocked down what was there for the new extension. Since the after shot was taken, Antonio has finished tiling the terrace and steps and will, tomorrow, begin tiling the inside. Barry will then come to fit the walnut kitchen he has built, at the end of next week.
I am feeling very excited but also very scared as the kitchen will either hit or miss with nothing in between. In fact I was so scared by my choices on Friday that I had no choice but to consume some Trampagne ( Strongbow in a can no less) with a friend while insisting she re-measure everything and prop my fragile ego. So very, very sad.
Anyway, having reassured myself all was well I then received some bad news re applicances. Despite having ordered and paid for everything in good time the shambles who sold it all to me have cocked up and cannot deliver on time or anywhere near. Lovely recorded message trumpeting their customer care etc etc but it is all complete nonsense. So then Fiasco,(note cunning change of name for legal reasons) for the avoidance of doubt you are dumped and welcome back to Buyers and Sellers (www.buyersandsellersonline.co.uk). I should never have defected in the first place.
I want to do another refurb
but I must sayNO NO NO
actually that is a lie. As we approach the final few weeks of Number Four I have found my eyes wandering again. Although we still have floors to lay and kitchens to fit I cannot help but feel slightly sad that the end is near and would love to find a sad little flat or house for the New Year. I have started to accumulate little piles of local papers just in case something derelict winks at me.
If we keep on schedule then we will pretty much have finished by Christmas and in a touching leap of faith I have ordered a turkey in a belief that we shall be able to cook it come Christmas Day. Turkeys in East Dulwich have proved controversial this season with many pages of of the East Dulwich forum (www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk) given over to William Rose and their allocation of Christmas Fayre. Due to very high demand and only limited storage space, they have allowed regular customers only first dibs on Christmas orders although there will be tons of stuff to buy without ordering too. Various “outraged” casual customers have berated the poor butchers for this slight although it seems perfectly fair and sensible to me ( note smug tone from regular customer). The irony is of course that when WR opened in East Dulwich we all leapt for joy at having such a fine addition to the High Street and marvelled at such a small concern providing such quality from such small premises. So for those who have missed out and fear no bird this season I may be able to help out (for a King's Ransom of course) and flog on my organic beauty.
That digression aside, I am thrilled at the prospect of having a kitchen again. As I type, the marvellous Rupert is assembling the Ikea units for the utility area and over in another part of town Barry and others are creating the walnut cabinets for the main area. I have visions of myself becoming a great hostess, throwing legendary parties for hundreds. The reality of course will be much less glamorous with three small children just being delighted to have something other than pasta for tea.
Laying down the law(n)
And so it came to pass that at 4.30pm Friday 2nd November 2007, the bombsite that was the rear of number four became a lush green oasis.
Pete and the chaps began laying the lawn, all 380m2 at about 8.00am and by afternoon it was done. The change was quite magical to behold and the grim view atthe back of the house has been completely transformed.The children are desperate to step on it and roll down the bank at the back but we need to leave it for a few weeks before any of those shenanigans can commence. The new fencing looks quite lovely and overall masses has been achieved on a very tight budget. Pete has now moved his focus to the front of the house where Jack's lovingly made (yet hellish to behold) fence has been removed and yet more bizarre outcrops of concrete found. Unsurprisingly, we have managed yet another two twenty yarders in the process. I will not know what to do with myself when Monday morning's arrive without the fanfare of the skip mans hooter blasting through the air. How will I spend my weekly skip budget? Maybe there is a skipman's benevolent fund to which I could contribute rather than greasing the palms of the living…
Now all we have to do is get the floating terrace tiled and the drainage channels covered in some suitably attractive stones and the garden will be done until we can afford some planting in the spring.
On the level
One of the biggest challenges at number four has been the garden. The early images show a sprawling plot that had been pretty muchcovered with sheds and outhouses. When these were filled, various heaps of rubbish and materials were simply left to fester in the garden. One of the largest heaps was covered in ivy and upon further investigation proved to be several thousand London Stock bricks which had come from the walled garden whichhad been knocked down to make way for a never built garage.
Although we had cleared the garden of sheds the main rubbish at the beginning of the project, actually tackling the garden proper has been deferred - until now.
The garden is 150ft long and about 35ft wide. What makes this garden so great, ie size, is also it's weakness in terms of landscaping it. The costs of tackling this, even to merely fence and turf, had seemed prohibitive. To actually incorporate any sort of design seemed impossible as the plot itself slopes up toward the end of the garden and is about 1m higher on the left. Wehad already figured we would need a JCB to get the area terraced or even levelled butthen we had the problemof removing the earthwhich had been excavated. In fact this problem was solved by Sarah Hammond who devised a design incorporating a bank at the rear of the garden which wouldcreate interest, retain thedifferent level running along the back of the garden and could use all of the earth that we had moved. The moving of the earth began on Monday and already the garden is beginning to take shape.
Following through from the kitchen extension we are having a terrace at the same floor level and covered in the same tiles. The levels for this have already been dug and we have a concrete slab by the end of Saturday. The tiles are porcelain and can be used inside and out with just a variation of finish to prevent slipping. As we cannot afford any planting at the moment I am hopeful that the terrace will create enough impact until we stumble across another stash of cash. The terrace will appear to float and the channel at the edges will also incorporate the drainage. Steps will be made from shuttered concrete that will then be faced in the tiles used for the floor. Sarah has created some amazing images and her attention to detail puts me to shame. I have reached the stage in the project where to have any sort of garden would be amazing but with her determination I think it is going to be much more than the sum of it's parts. She has also designed some further stages so that if and when we have more cash the design will grow in stages. Mrs Hammond I salute you.
We have had a bit of a touch with the landscaper too. Peter McKnight is a mate of Barry McGovern our builder who put us in touch to get this project of the ground. He was a landscaper in exotic parts but has more recently beeninvolved in laying sports surfaces and pitches - no wonder our plot did not faze him when he is used to laying 10000m of football pitch. He and his team arrived , pulled out the last of the old sheet metal fencing, rid us of our rotting trees and drove the JCB for all they were worth. My kids have been transfixed by the giant digger and dumper at the back and to watch Pete operate them has been a source of wonderment. Maybe Bob the Builder theme parties at our gaff could bring in the bacon?
“If I had all the money in the world I would buy everything - except courgette’s”
India Gibbon, aged 4, 20th October 2007.
Whereas if I had just some of the money in the world I would buy a large team of tradesmento finish number four. We have been going for almost six months now and although the end is in sight I would like these last bits to hurry along so that we could unpack our belongings and live a bit in this place.
The lovely shell is now rewired and rendered and is now being plasterboarded so that we can get the underfloor heating down and the screed laid. This needs to be done ASAP as it has to dry out for a minimum of four weeks before the underfloor heating can be turned on. Although I like the idea of underfloor heating and it was toasty on a winters morning in Upland Road, it is proving less straight forward for this house. Because we have two different areas, on one level, with two different sub floors we need two different circuits each fitted differently - apparently. One company says it is straight forward and another say's it is tricky because our joist centres are not 400mm and therefore we would need a biscuit screed blah blah blah. Cannot bear the thought of complications so that area shall have a radiator instead and jolly well like it as I believe the only biscuit in this house should be of the edible kind. This would also mean that we would have some form of heating in this while the screed dries elsewhere. I have visions of us all wearing woollen combinations before long to stave off the cold. I seem to remember Charles Ingles in The Little House on the Prairie looking strangely alluring in his so maybe this will be a positive thing.
The flooring for such a large area is also proving troublesome. We had identified a fine Basalt tile, 60cm square, but have since learnt that the lead time is in excess of eight weeks but sooner if we want to ship them, at our expense, from a satellite warehouse in Antwerp. Sadly this would double the price and as we need 100m2 for the kitchen and terrace areas is too darn expensive. The solution we have found is a porcelain tile that can be used inside and out and comes in a variety of greys. Although the Basalt would be the King of floors I am content with a lesser royal for a saving of about 4k. But if I had all the money in the world I would have the Basalt and a shed load of courgette's to boot.